Marriage and Family

Training our children about money and possessions begins at birth (Proverbs 22:6). For better or worse, we are their tutors, every hour of every day. Albert Schweitzer put it this way: “There are only three ways to teach a child. The first is by example; the second is by example; the third is by example.”

Sharing honestly with our children about our weaknesses and our need for God’s strength can teach them a great deal, as our friend Vaneetha Rendall Risner so beautifully explains in this powerful article. She writes, “Parenting through weakness can bring God glory. As we rely on God and his grace, he shines through our lives.”

In September Randy spoke over Zoom with Steve Silver of Men’s Golf Fellowship. Having both lost their wives during the last year, they shared grief experiences and spoke about Heaven and the great hope it holds.

God built a desire for happiness into our children, just like it’s built into every person who ever has or ever will live. The important question is, where will they seek that happiness? Will they look for it in Christ and in living a life rooted in Him, or will they seek it in the world and its endless empty mirages?

I wonder what God wants you to learn about Him through this? You cannot change your husband as I’m sure you’ve realized after 50 plus years! But God can change you as you focus on His love for you and trust Him each day for what He brings your way.

At the end of the day we have neither control over nor responsibility for the choices our adult children make. We can only model good choices and live in a way that reflects Jesus. We can pray, we can love well, and we can trust our perfect Father for the outcome.

Nanci and I said to each other honestly, “We are different enough that if we didn’t have the Lord we might have divorced for irreconcilable differences.” But God reconciled our differences and made each of us better. And in time the differences weren’t irritating; they became endearing.

It’s wonderful your daughter has professed faith. I don’t think you need to stress about making sure she prays the sinner’s prayer again or pressure her to do so, since knowing Jesus is a heart issue and not a matter of saying particular words.

Recently a man in a struggling marriage asked me how to become a godly husband. My first thought was, “You’ve just taken the first step—knowing you need to be a godly husband and asking for help.”